Ask Alan

Emily fears for her son's future! And she wants me to give it her straight...

November 2008

Question

Dear Alan,

I value your Scopes and your site so much. I would be immensely appreciative if you could tune in and give me some insights about my situation. I am working two jobs right now to save enough money so that my husband, our wonderful son and I can move into a new house in a different neighbourhood. I am so scared that my son may be getting mixed up with the wrong sort of crowd – or worse. Is it as bad as I think? Worse? Will we ever get out of here? Please let me know what you see. Be honest with me. I can take it.

Emily

Answer

Dear Emily,

Before I get started, let me say a couple of things. The first is that I make it a policy not to do a reading for someone other than my client. What I mean by that is that I don't feel that it's right for me to tune into someone else's energy and then relate my psychic impressions to a third-party. Admittedly, this is more of a guideline than a blanket rule that is without exception.

To be sure, where to draw the line can be tricky. In this instance, I will do my best not to reveal anything private or confidential in nature to you about your son. Instead, I will approach this reading more from a point of view of how you can improve your relationship with him.

The second preface that I would like to make is one more of relief than anything else. I really feared what I might perceive when I read your question. But after I myself calmed down and connected to that space of objectivity and independence whence I read, I felt SO much more reassured. I say this because I want you to know from the outset that I don't feel that anything more ominous or nefarious – other than typical adolescent angst – is taking place here.

Now before I address your relationship with your son, I would like to say that I immediately get this image of you standing over plans. Specifically, they resemble an architect's drawings or blueprints. This suggests to me that you will be moving. But I sense that there is going to be something of a delay. You see, I sense that you will be building your next home – not purchasing one that someone else has lived in already.

I feel that it's not terribly far from where you live presently. I find myself being pulled westward and then slightly northerly in direction. It's a suburb. And it feels to me to be a very new development. All I see now are plots that have only the crudest of outlines. You are going to need to practise your visualisation skills as what it looks like at the moment is nothing like you'll end up with.

But I get a very good feeling about this. I feel that you and your family will be quite happy there. I keep seeing an image of a berry – a blueberry to be more specific. So, I want to say that there's a connection here – perhaps it's the name of the street. I like to give that kind of information because it can sometimes help you know that you're in the right place.

Timing? People always want to know exactly when this or that is going to happen. You're no different. If I had to say, the move feels like December. And no, I'm afraid that we're not talking next month. Remember, the advantage with self-build is that you get what you want. The disadvantage is that it takes time. Yet, everything I sense suggests that it's going to be worth the wait.

Now, let's move on to your son and your relationship with him. The amount of love that you have for him comes through loud and clear. And better still, I feel that there aren't any barriers between you. You give him his space. I see this image of you treading lightly – even tiptoeing around him. But I don't feel that this is all that necessary. It comes across to me that you can be more direct in your approach and your conversation with him.

I feel that you have wanted to show your respect for him by not invading his space or broaching any topics that he might consider off-limits. That's great. If only more parents were as sensitive as you are. But I have to say that I feel that there is one drawback, one downside that I want to highlight.

When I'm in his energy, I sense that he feels no inclination to open up to you about things that you've not brought up yourself. It's like since you've never tried to talk to him about drugs or gangs – and let's be honest with one another because those are your concerns – then he's not going to bring it up first.

I mean this most respectfully, but I sense that it's as if he doesn't know that you want to talk about or are even interested in these things. I sense that it's like he doesn't appreciate that you're so very concerned about these areas. Does he know that you love him? Of course, he does. But I don't sense that he realises just how much anxiety you're going through right now.

I sense that the biggest challenge you face with your son is simply opening the channels of communication. Once this is done and the dialogue is flowing, my impressions are that you will be very much relieved. Below are a couple of links to organisations that offer advice on how to talk to children about drugs. They might help to make you feel less self-conscious about crossing into what you have so far considered his personal and very private space.

Drugs and Your Kids
Talking to Your Kids About Drugs
Talking About Drugs

Good luck and please stay in touch!

With that, I wish you all the best.

Alan

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